too many words to describe a sequence of melody

i never felt worse then what i have gone through this week. Well work in the station was as usual hectic. I only get an hr of rest from after all the crashes and burns, send an sms to wish her a happy bday the least that i could do.

So hysterical. I drift off to my dreamland faster then that i thought i could.

I wish I could smoke smoke and smoke, drink drink and drink to my fullfilment, no need to have any worries. Well worrying just makes oneself feel even worse. Am still feeling stints of pains as day pass by, i am not sure why, but it really does hurt very much to see someone u treasure leave you.

You may look fine and feel fine, but this are crap to decieve yourself, look deep down in your heart, can u let go or have u let go and forgotten everything. I doubt so you have? maybe you tell yourself not to think, but fuck that is not the true.

Is it wrong to act as nothing has happen, I wish I didn't have to feel this way, I just don't know what to say. Mayb i am just feeling that lonliness creeping up.

I woke up in the middle of the nite at times to jus ponder what the fuck am I still breathing and still alive.
Waling down the streets alone, just left no meaning anymore.

Words that I have never written, feelings that still lingers deep down in my heart!

Standing afar jus wathing and not feeling anything is the worse feeling............

its 1.38am sleeping time! wish i could fall into a deep trance. N never get up from it.

Now listening to Akon - Mr lonely